That depends on how we’re defining normal. If you think normal is the norm, then yes. It’s typical to see insecurity, envy, arrogance, depression, etc., in almost everyone we know. We’ve actually come up with an umbrella term for these dysfunctional traits – the human condition. These problems arise when we’re so driven to achieve all the time, but don’t know how to cope effectively with life’s challenges.
We’re told from a young age that we are our feelings, but we’re not responsible for the way we are feeling. We generally tend to excuse inappropriate behaviors by saying things like “They were just angry” or “They couldn’t help themselves” or “My life is making me depressed because nothing ever goes right for me.” This is because we readily accept the idea that our feelings have control over us, or that other people’s behaviors control us, or that our reactions are not under our control. We’ve all heard someone say that we’re “making” them angry, but this is just another way in which we give away our responsibility for our feelings or behaviors to something outside of our control.
We’re taught that our destiny is within our control, and there is some truth to that. But there’s plenty in our lives that’s not within our control, including other people. The takeaway here is that although there’s plenty in our lives that we can’t control, what we can control is our reaction to life. Unnecessary pain is what arises from our own insecurities and it tends to build if we try to ignore or suppress it. Insecurity is optional in our lives and only hinders our maturity.
If you’re constantly feeling jealous, possessive, or depressed, you’re focusing on the wrong things in life. By developing your self-esteem and security with yourself you can stop feeling these unnecessary pains. There is plenty of pain in this world that you cannot control. Don’t add to it.
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